Archive for the ‘ self ’ Category

Permanent Happiness

When I was very little, my mom would bring me off at some pre-kindergarden school. While the other kids were playing, or socializing, or whatever it is that little kids do, I would grab the bars and scream “Let me out!” Although I most certainly don’t remember this, I can imagine myself pulling at [ READ MORE ]

Between Extremes

  • February 15th, 2010
  • Posted in rant . self

Sometimes when I don’t know what to write, I start off typing these 3 little words:“Drugs, Sex, Violence” I don’t know what that means.  I’m not sure if there’s a significance to the order, but that’s how it comes out. Probably it’s an unconscious homage to Hunter Thompson, a man who made his life a [ READ MORE ]

13 things I learned this year

1) Trying and wishing are two different things Is your life set up around the things you want? If not then you’re not trying, just wishing. 2) You don’t get to tell yourself what you want You get to listen. Sure you could ignore it, but what else is there? 3) None of these are goals: independence, strength, confidence, money, time The [ READ MORE ]

Of Ghosts

I met Andy at a bar to talk. I had never met him before, he was just a friend of a friend; later I’d find out he wasn’t even that. He was a squirrely guy, about 32 and nervous, jumpy. The kind of person who makes you uncomfortable because you feel like [ READ MORE ]

Signs of Awakeness

  • December 14th, 2009
  • Posted in rant . self

I’m half awake. My whole face feels like it’s sagging. I’ve gotten plenty of sleep, more than enough really. So I’m tired because I’m unfocused. Because trying to keep everything inside my head is tiring. Lazy people should stay focused all the time, otherwise they risk over working themselves with [ READ MORE ]

Thinking Like a Pig – Overthinking, Being Present

  • June 1st, 2009
  • Posted in self

I eat like a pig. I barely taste food, as soon as a morsel of dinner is on its way down my stomach I’m already shoveling more food into my gaping hole of a mouth.  There are no pauses in between, no time to taste ingredients, it’s all just one fluid mechanical process, resulting in hunger [ READ MORE ]

Self Imposed

  • May 24th, 2009
  • Posted in self

For most of my life I I’ve believed I’m brilliant.  I guess it never really occurred that you might have to create something brilliant before you’re brilliant.   But I always felt I was unique enough that I must be brilliant.  And then walking the streets on a saturday night eating chocolate raisins out of a [ READ MORE ]